I was thinking about ventriloquists this afternoon. Fifty years ago there were a lot more ventriloquists than there are today. What do you suppose happened to them all? Then I realized, they had merely switched to another profession that required them to talk out of both sides of their mouths: politics. The latest example of this? Texting bans. I text while I drive, I'll admit that. I also check my email, update facebook, look for reviews on that new restaurant I've heard so much about. I've even been down to get in a few hands of poker while cruising down the interstate at 70 mph. Do these behaviors impair my driving? Absolutely! Should they be regulated? I don't see why not.
DOT and state governments have picked this as their flavor of the month issue. You may have seen Secretary of Transportation Ray LaHood joining forces with Oprah yesterday in an effort to encourage drivers across the country to "Shut up and drive." DOT will tell you it wants to crack down on all distracted driving behaviors. They'll site studies that claim texting while driving is a visual (eyes off the road), manual (hand off the wheel) and cognitive (mind off the road) distraction. They also like to point out that drivers who send a text message while behind the wheel at 55 mph are taking their eyes off the road for 4.6 seconds (long enough to travel a football field, including the end-zones).
Pardon me for asking, but wouldn't this provide a corollary for other behaviors involving mobile devices and drivers? Can we not assume that I'll be just as distracted while browsing the web on my Samsung A-737 as I would be text messaging? And yet, federal and state regulations continue to fall short of addressing the entire issue.
In Kentucky, the texting ban that passed into law bans the use of a mobile device for person to person text based communications (specifically e-mail and text messaging). So, taking this in a literalistic fashion as I am wont to do, I gather that web browsing and mobile games are still ok? In fact, subsection 3 of the new law specifically allows the use of a mobile device's GPS capabilities. We're not talking about a Garmin here, we're talking about a phone that you still have to hold in at least on hand and if you're looking for and following directions while driving with one hand, aren't you likely to be distracted for much longer than the 4.6 seconds it takes to send a text?
Not only does the law stop short of categorizing the full range of distracted driving behaviors attributable to mobile devices, police have been stripped of their ability to punish those caught engaging in the narrow range it does disallow. Until January 1st, 2011 those caught texting while driving will be subject to nothing more than a stern look and an admonishing finger shake from the frustrated officers patrolling Kentucky's roads.
Lawmakers: if we're going to compare texting while driving to the effects of alcohol consumption, shouldn't we treat it with a little more severity than a $25 fine and a grace period of 8 months in which to violate the new law with impunity? Last I checked, ignorance of the law is no excuse. Give these bills some teeth or stop passing them. This useless political posturing, while admittedly raising awareness about the issue, is doing nothing to deal with the problem. Any politician suggesting a bill that fined drunk drivers $25 for a first offence and $50 subsequently, with an 8 month period following passage into law where the punishment was waived and also specifically worded the bill to only apply to those drunk on beer, but not wine or hard liquor would be tarred, feathered and run out of town on a rail. But by not imposing stiff (or, in fact ANY) penalties for violating the new law and by not including all dangerous forms of mobile use and limiting allowable behavior to hands-free voice communication that is exactly what our lawmakers are proposing.
"No, officer. I wan't texting. I was just googleing Ray LaHood's address so I could put it into my GPS and visit him to tell him what a great job he's doing." DOT: If you're going to wage a campaign against distracted driving do it right. Government: if you think this is an issue that you need to regulate, do it. But these wishy-washy, feel good, slap on the wrist laws do nothing but trivialize the issue.
And in case you were wondering, I typed this entire entry while cruising down the freeway at a cool 60 mph.
